Tuesday, June 28, 2011


Today's entry comes to you from the seats of The Muny, theco nations oldest & largest outdoor theater.  I got here early to nab some free seats & have 20 minutes until curtain, so why not write a blog?

Today was weigh-in day.  I didn't expect anything major after last week's 4.5 lb drop, but I was super active this week & stayed well within my calorie goals for the week (Yes, even with that whole bag of Gardettos I devoured in 4 days.  Lesson learned). 

This last week was the start of the Shrinking Jeans Burst Into Summer Challenge.  Part of the challenge is a 6 week bootcamp.  As I mentioned last week, I started a few days late due to work taking over my life, but I caught up!  I did the Week 1 workout on Wednesday, Friday & Sunday & did Week 2, Day 1 yesterday (ouch).  I would be lying if I said it was easy.  As someone still nearly 100 lbs from my "ideal body weight" some of the exercises were a lot to take on.  But I did it!  The first day was not a breeze, but when I finally finished & collapsed in my living room floor in a pool of sweat I was SO PROUD of myself & totally exhilarated!  Sprints for sure kicked my butt, but I can already tell that they're going to help me become a better runner.  The squats have made my legs ache for days, but I can feel the strength I've gained already.  The side plank dips . . . well they just plain sucked.  Let's not lie.

After working my butt off all week I was hoping for a great number this week.  So imagine my disappointment when I saw this . . .

Previous weight : 231.5 lbs
Current weight  : 234.5 lbs

Gain of 3 lbs.

What the heck.  Yes, the Gardettos were a fail & so was a drunken diner meal on Sunday night, but I still ate well the rest of the week.  I compensated well & tracked my food, so that can't really be the issue.  I do feel like I'm retaining water somewhat & maybe I gained a little muscle?  Who knows. 

But honestly, I'm not that bent out of shape about it.  I KNOW I worked hard this week, despite literally working EVERY DAY for the last week & being home just to sleep.  I had many a chance to blow it & to break my no fast food streak (almost 5 months now!), but I didn't.  I could've easily blown off my bootcamp workout, but I didn't.  I'm up 3 lbs, but I don't care. :)


Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Follow through.

The past month or so, I haven't been very on top of my game.  Gym visits have been fewer & far between & I haven't been tracking accurately at all (I have definitely been calorie conscious).  That resulted in not much progress. 

After my race (recap soon, I swear!) I feel rejuvenated, but I'm still lacking in my follow through.  thus my dry erase board weekly calendar is born!  I'm a procrastinator at heart.  I can always finish the dishes later or put my laundry away tomorrow.  Its really easy for me to let workouts go to the wayside if I run out of time.  My solution is to schedule my time better.  Working random different hours throws me off most of the time, so if I plot out what I need to do in advance I'll be more likely to do it.  I need to stop fitting exercise into my schedule only when my friends go to the gym.

This last week I am back on my game.  I've made a couple late night gym visits, swam & had a few impromptu home workouts as well (which is hard to make myself do without a dvd player!)  My enthusiasm is a little surprising, honestly, but I'm pretty excited about the progress I made this week.

Previous weight : 236.0 lbs
Current weight. : 231.5 lbs
Loss of 4.5 lbs!!

I literally stepped on the scale this morning & said "You've got to be shitting me."  I was definitely a bit shocked, but very happy with that number.  I guess that's what happens when you step up your workouts, track your food & eat well, eh?  Another exciting milestone is that at this weight my BMI is officially under 40!  I started with a BMI of 49.1 & now it is 39.7.  Wow.

This week also marks the start of the Shrinking Jeans Burst Into Summer challenge, which I spur of the moment signed up for last week!  Its an 11-week long team challenge with a 6 week bootcamp.  I missed the first workout yesterday due to getting called into work, but I'm going to catch up tonight or get up early & do it tomorrow.  I needed something different to mix up my workouts & I think this will definitely spice things up a bit.

I'm continually shocked by the progress I've made in the last (near) 6 months.  Everytime I get a compliment from someone I'm still flabbergasted & don't know quite how to react.  I can't remember the last time I had this much drive to finish something without being so scared that I was going to fail.  Don't get me wrong, I'm still scared.  Slightly terrified, even.  The difference is I KNOW I can do this.  Its all in my hands.  Everyday I feel more comfortable in my skin & its the best feeling.


Monday, June 20, 2011

Tuck & roll.

Ever feel like some things you have to say aren't important enough to blog?  I feel that way most of the time, but nonetheless, here I am.  Today I am going to share a NSV (for those not aware, that means a Non-Scale Victory).  Its minor, but significant to me.  Something that most people wouldn't think twice about.

Yesterday I tucked in my shirt.

Yes, this is something I'm required to do as part of the dress code at the job I've worked at for over 3 years.  No, until yesterday I hadn't ever done it once.  Sure, I faked it.  I would just roll the edges underneath & periodically check to make sure it hadn't fallen down.  It was obvious, I'm sure. 

Being overweight nearly my entire life I can't clearly remember ever actually tucking in a shirt.  When you carry so much weight around your midsection, there is nothing in the WORLD that makes you want to make it more obvious.  Tucking in a shirt makes you feel as if you look like Violet from Willy Wonka after she turns into a blueberry.  Huge & round.

After wearing my new skirt on Saturday I just got (a size 20 that's a little roomy, I might add), I noticed my fake tuck wasn't working so well with the polyester-type fabric-it kept falling down every few minutes.  So when I got dressed for my impromptu shift on Sunday I thought to myself "Hey, you look pretty good in this skirt."  I didn't look bulbous around my midsection (though believe me, it hasn't gone away).  I looked sort of normal.  So I decided to try an experiment.  "Well I'll tuck it in, just to see how it looks." I said to myself.  After a few adjustments it was in place & I was actually okay with how it looked. 

Wait a minute.  How did that happen?

In all my 26 + years I've never been okay with this & all of a sudden I'm a normal shirt-tucking member of society.  Its going to take a while for me to get used to this.


PS : Race recap is still coming, I promise.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

5 & 50.

So its been a few weeks.  The last month has kind of threw me through a loop.  My last post was about the devastation in Joplin.  Anything I had to say here I felt paled in comparison, to be honest.  After my visit there recently,  I just didn't know what to say.  Its much worse than the pictures show.  Much worse than the news describes.  Much worse than you can imagine.  Driving through the affected area, it felt like I was in a third world country.  Buildings in shambles, debris everywhere, people driving around in cars with no windshields or windows.  What little we were able to bring I hope makes even a little bit of difference, but its miniscule in the big picture.  While most natural disasters take 1-2 years to clean up, its going to take Joplin 3-5 years.  Mother Nature is not someone I want to mess with.

Now time to catch up since my last real post.  If we're friends on Facebook or you follow me on Twitter, then you're hip to the news that I signed up for & this past weekend did my first 5K!  I meant to do a big write up before it, but time & life got the best of me, so suprise!  I'm not going to elaborate a ton on the race, because I'm going to do a separate post about it in the next day or so. :)

I feel like I've done pretty well in the past few weeks.  A little too much eating out & too little food in my cabinets didn't make for the best choices I could have made, but all in all my moderation was in check.  One great development is that the pool is finally open!!  My friend Mackenzie has a pool in her complex, so basically I can swim whenever I want, so that rules.  I couldn't make it the first few days it was open because I was out of town & working a ton when I got back, but I quickly made up for that & swam 4 or 5 days straight.  I just need to plan meals around swimming better since I'm DYING afterwards.

So now onto the numbers.

Previous weight : 239.5
Current weight. : 236.0

Do you know what that means?

I'VE LOST 50 POUNDS!!!  Its weigh-in official today.  I've been hanging out, above & below 236 for the last couple weeks, but the last Tuesday or 2 I've been about 237.5.  Not today, though. :)

5 months ago I would have thought dropping 50 pounds was impossible.  5 months ago I wouldn't have even entertained the idea of doing a 5k, for fear of being the last one to finish. 

5 months ago I was miserable.

Today I am not.